Are you feeling like one of the characters in the hit show, “Friends?” Do you avoid your friends when you’re on a date? Do your friends ask the most inappropriate questions in front of your date? Do you struggle with introductions when it comes to friends and someone you’re dating?
I totally understands how difficult the introduction process can be at any stage of a relationship but especially at the infancy stage when you don’t even know if you like the person.
Introducing the person your dating to your friends can be tricky and can often open the door for your friends to play “21 Questions. Can you recall the last time you debated how to introduce someone you just met to your friends? What about being in the unfortunate situation of having to do so unexpectedly.
You should always be prepared for what I like to refer to as the hit and run collision. A hit and run collision is when you are on a pre-date or first date and you run into a friend or group of friends unexpectedly. Your friend(s) will of course greet you with a Kool-Aid smile but with eyes screaming, “Who is this?” I feel your pain.
Most would say the overwhelming feeling of despair would come instantly upon seeing your friend(s). If you’re like me, your first reaction is to avoid them at all cost, but from personal experience, that only makes matters worse. If you act like you don’t see them, they will make the biggest scene to get your attention, how embarrassing!
A seemingly innocent question, “Who is this?” has so much complication involved. And it invites more questions. So be careful in how you respond. Not only do you have your inquisitive friend(s) listening, Mr. or Ms. Potential will also have their ears wide open for the response.
Take it from me, the next time you are faced with a hit and run collision, think twice about using the classic line “We’re just friends.” “We’re just friends,” is an open invitation to play “21 Questions:”
* Where did you meet?
* How long have you been seeing one another?
* Have you slept together yet?
Get my point? And if your responses seem uncomfortable, irritated, annoyed and snippy that’s a dead giveaway that there is more to the story. It’s best to remain calm, cool, and collected and be straightforward. On a first date, or even on the first couple of dates, you don’t need a label yet, so why even say, “We’re just friends.” Keep it simple. State your date’s name and indicate what the two of you are up to; going skiing, having dinner, taking dance lessons, whatever the case may be. That will get you off the hot seat for the moment. Just be prepared, “21 Questions” may come later.