Positive break ups? I’m sure you’re wondering, “how can that be”? Every break up seems like the end of the world. It generally leaves your heart aching, stomach hurting and mind in a whirl. Ask yourself this question, “do I really want to be with someone who doesn’t want to be with me?” Of course not! Many times people break up, make up, break up again. Life is short so why not focus on you.
Let me give you a few tips about how to have more positive break ups. Breakups are like death. You must go through the process. First you are in shock, then you are sad, then you may get angry until finally one day you wake up and it’s no longer an issue. Going through the shock is the time when you need to sit down, regroup and don’t act on impulse. Sit yourself down and absorb what just happened. Step away from the cell phone and computer, refraining from an over emotional contact. Next, comfort yourself. That’s right, this is your time for self comfort. Perhaps you lay on the couch all day watching sappy love stories and eating Ben & Jerry’s ice cream, or indulge in a pizza. It’s o.k. to cry, eat something you love and just have a “poor me” day.
When “poor me day” is over, pick yourself up, dust yourself off and get out of the house. Fresh air and sunshine works wonders. Give thanks for three positive things in your life and remind yourself how lucky you are to not be in a dysfunctional relationship. Give to you. It’s o.k. to be sad during a break up, perfectly normal. You just can not let it take over your life. If you find yourself becoming angry, that’s o.k. too. Perfectly normal feeling, for a day. Again, let the anger go. Why be angry, when in the long run if your relationship wasn’t working then ultimately the break up is the best thing for you.
Let yourself go through the process, shock, grief, anger and let it go! If you look at the positive aspects of your life, focus on the lessons you learned from your break up, then set positive attainable goals for yourself, you will be putting yourself in a much more positive, productive and healthy mindset. Break ups don’t have to stay negative. There is always something positive that comes out of a negative situation. It’s all in the way you view it.