Can saying “I Love You” Too Soon Be Damaging to a Relationship?
We all dream of hearing those three little words. Countless songs, books, movies and poems have been written about them. Heck, we’ve even created a special day of the year dedicated to them – Valentine’s Day.
And yet as wonderful as they are to hear, said at the wrong moment, by the wrong person and BAM! we freeze and feel trapped. Sadly these three little words can be as poisonous as they are miraculous.
This is not a feeling that’s exclusive to men or women. Both sexes are guilty of wanting love too much and taking it too readily from the person in their lives. For love to work, there must be balance, a meeting of the minds and the hearts.
Women are perhaps a little guiltier of expressing their feelings before the time is right, but that doesn’t mean men don’t do it too. The bottom line is that giving your feelings to someone who doesn’t appreciate them is more than damaging than keeping them inside.
Nobody likes rejection and that’s the risk you take when you tell someone you are not sure about that you love them. And it should never feel like a risk. If something in your stomach is telling you to wait, then you should wait.
However, there are instances when it’s justified as you may need to test the waters. If you’ve been spending a lot of time with someone, if they always enjoy your company, if they keep calling to see you and if you feel something special for them, you may want to change the relationship from casual to serious. If you do feel it important to tell this person how you feel, be prepared to walk away. You cannot force another to feel what you feel and you cannot force another to love you.
The fact is that saying ‘I love you’ changes the parameters of a relationship. It’s an open admission that you want another person in your life. And it comes a whole string of expectations. And with expectations, comes disappointments. The person you love may seem wondrous to you but they are only human and chances are they will let you down. You have to make sure you are not prepared to fall at the first hurdle.
In short your love is precious. Don’t throw it about. Make sure you keep it for the person who truly appreciates it.
**This article was written by the guys behind a new dating comparison site that aims to help online dating users.
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